The Adventures of Laura-Kibbles and Bits

Last night I get home from work and I call out for my dog. I hear what sounds like paws sliding on the wood floor. But where is she? I call out again. Again I hear paws sliding on wood floor but no Jazzy. I head to my bedroom and walk over to side of bed her dog bed occupies.

There’s my dog stuck, in fact pinned under my bed. I have no clue how it happened. I just know the lowest part of the frame was resting on her spine. I couldn’t get her rolled over.

I have never lifted my bed. But I did last night. But Jazzy still wasn’t moving from underneath it. I dropped the foot of headboard onto baseboard on my wall to rest. Even with this extra room, she was stuck.

The only thing I could think to do was call 9-1-1. I was put on hold. (Suicide hotline-please hold) I found out the reason is police are not allowed to go on calls to help dogs. So she said she’d have Animal Control call me. But not before asking me why I couldn’t just lift bed, move it over and pick dog up. Hahahaha! Superman, that’s me! Girl you come over here and deadlift 250-300 pounds, hold it up by yourself and fetch a 38 pound dog. If I could have reached through the phone, I’d be writing this blog wearing prison orange from a jail cell.

So 9-1-1 was no help. I call my daughter to see if she was near. She was, I cried into the phone what was happening. Kris got home, and the plan was, I would lift and she’d fetch Jazzy. She lifted too. This just gets better. Then tells me to let go, she’s got it. I’m a Mom first, I wasn’t letting my kid hold that kind of weight and get hurt. I held it. Jazzy ran further under the bed. Lord please help me! I try lifting bed higher and my daughter screams to lower it more as now she was pinned on other side.

So I knew it was going to have to be me to get Jazzy. But I knew my daughter could not stand there holding that kind of weight. I yelled at her (at that point it was all yelling) to get the metal folding chair out of other room. All the while I am yelling and she is yelling back. (We’re Italian) Anyways, she brought chair and got it opened and sat it under frame of the bed and I lowered the bed on top of it. It was holding. Thank you Jesus!

I get on the floor and I have to calm myself to talk to my dog. She wasn’t coming near me with my voice raised. I think the entire experience had her nervous enough without her Mom yelling like a crazy woman. I might not be crazy but last night I was getting there fast!

I finally got Jazzy out and let her outside. She ran around like nothing had ever happened. Now a knock at the door. Animal Control. Bahahahaha! Well since he was there, he checked Jazzy out and helped me get my bed back on all fours once again. I needed the help as the adrenaline was long gone and I was feeling the pain from lifting my bed, not once but twice.

So Jazzy was fine, ate her food, ran around the backyard like nothing had ever happened. I on the other hand, was in pain and needed to be sedated from the entire experience. I don’t think my dog knows how close she came to being Kibbles and Bits.

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